A Beginners Guide to Cruises: Worries VS Reality
I kicked off travelling in 2020 with a whole new experience. A cruise around the Caribbean, celebrating my home girl’s 30th birthday. I was excited but also overwhelmed with anxiety when I thought about the trip. WHY?
I was shooketh that the ship would sink. I’ve seen what happened in Titanic. People ended up pop off. I wasn’t trying to go out like that.
Reality
There was a whole deck worth of lifeboats out on display. Did they work? I don’t know, it never came to that. Plus each cabin had life jackets and. Oh, and all guests had to attend a compulsory safety briefing.
I can’t swim so why the hell would I fast myself to be out at sea. I get in 1-2 argument and I’m getting thrown overboard with the sharks. I was going to joke and say that I’m black I can’t swim, but it’s a bad stereotype. (My homegirl has actually written an article about it) Turns out 95% of Black British adults actually do not swim!
Reality
As long as you don’t move mad and think you are Tarzan you’re most probably not going to fall aboard. I actually started attending swimming classes though because I was so panicked. Sometimes fear is the best motivator.
I was going to be surrounded by old white pensioners.
Reality
Lol I actually was. Out of 3100 passengers, about 20 were melanated. After the initial stares, everyone stayed in their lane. Plus some of the people on the cruise were actually a vibe and a half!
Betty had a double hip replacement before she came on the cruise and had to get carried back to the ship because she got paralytic drunk after having too much rum on the beach.
Terry loved up the Reggae segment and was singing live with the band when Bob Marley came on, leaving his wife in the corner.
Jo looked majorly classy and boujie, but boyyy the lethal swear words that came out of her mouth when she was ready.
My favourite crew ever was made up of 4 widows (plus life goals Anne) who were solo holidaying. They played a game on the beach shouting “hey stranger” to men that walked past. The mens reactions were so priceless.
The food is going to be bland/unseasoned and I’m going to be stressed out about it.
Reality
Lol I played myself big time. I ate better in those 2 weeks than I have on any other holiday. Proper 3-5 course meals daily. Top class chefs and major flavour. I could write a whole post on the food alone!
All the activities are going to be for the elderly so I’ll be bored.
Reality
Bingo is life and there is so much to do on a cruise ship. The ship has a casino, library, a mini shopping mall. Plus old school movies actually bang. And once you are exploring the different islands you’re not that fussed to even know what activities are happening when you get back half the time.
I’m really proud that I didn’t let me initial worries stop me from enjoying the cruise. Would you happily book a cruise?
Cuba: Lost Files & Journal
When you think Cuba, naturally your mind goes to straight to Havana or Camilla Cabello, with the Havana tune. Scratch that whole picture though, as I was literally on the other side of the island.
Where I Stayed
I stayed in the city of Palma Soriano with my Cuban friend who has a house there. The city is home to about 76,000 people and about an hour away from Santiago de Cuba. I had the most laid back 2 week getaway. We had no set plans and no military itenary. Just pure vibes, good weather, and for the most part other than my friend who is bilingual I was the only English speaker. I didn’t do tourist Cuba, and for that, I had a real ass experience. I love getting the opportunity to live like a local and blend in. Palma Soriano has no hotels, and I don’t fling around the word authentic around often but this was the real dealio. I also visited Santiago and stayed in a hotel for 2 nights in Holguin. Both these cities had a different feel to Palma Soriano.
Photo Tragedy
I came back from my getaway with hundreds of photos and videos. Hundreds might even be me being humble, I had well over a thousand. Anyway, I get back to the UK with the most limited phone storage, to the point that I had to delete stuff and then delete the deleted stuff just to salvage a tiny bit of data. In the midst of all of that I happened to delete pretty much all my Cuba photos so yeah... I’m stressed.
I did, however, make an Instagram story on my highlights before I went on my deleting spree. Priorities right! Check the story out.
Frizzy journal
For the first time in I think ever, I consistently wrote in my journal documenting my thoughts of experiences on holiday daily. I always die of laughter when I read over things that I write. I always sit there thinking why do you have to be so savage? Then I reply “I didn’t choose savage, the life chose me.”
“Had lunch in a venue with a beautiful view. The food was shit again (shock horror) They brought me cold rice. And I didn’t have a drink with my meal because they only had beer. Sober life struggles.”
“Visited Santiago de Cuba today. It’s a lot more vibezy than Palma. More touristy and bright coloured. I visited a cathedral, to take pictures to send to my Ga’mama. Then I ended up taking a picture in the square with a Cuban Abuela. I’m pretty sure I paid her for this picture that I didn’t even want to take!”
“At 8pm we head out looking for a nail shop. After what seems like forever we end up in a nail shop in someone’s house. On the back of this woman’s door is a large machete... Must I say large? Is a machete ever small haha. I know I’m always in my own world, but now I have a fully functioning movie trailer to an epic movie that I’ve made up. Anyway I got my nails done, they are so beautiful. I’m in awe and gassed that I paid 20 pesos for them. About 60 pence.”
“I managed to get 10 minutes in the wifi spot in town before it started pouring down and I got backslapped too many times to count by the rain. When we got home we went up on the rooftop to play in the rain. It felt good to be carefree.”
