The Ungrateful Refugee
By Dina Nayeri
Book Review Genre: Non-fiction
Publisher: Canongate
What is it like to be a refugee? It is a question many of us do not give much thought, yet there are more than 25 million refugees in the world. To be a refugee is to grapple with your place in society, attempting to reconcile the life you have known with a new, unfamiliar home. All this while bearing the burden of gratitude in your host nation: the expectation that you should be forever thankful for the space you have been allowed. *Taken directly from the book*
Watch The Breakdown
Part memoir, part reconstruction, this non-fiction book serves as a compassionate and unforgettable reminder that refugees are more than a statistic and number. Dina brings in her own personal experiences of having to leave her homeland of Iran at the age of 8, as well as combining stories of others who have become refugees and asylum seekers in the recent years.
You discover the stories of those who were thriving in their careers whilst in their home countries and now cannot work. Those who are determind to stay close to their cultural identity and do so through food. And those who cannot bring themselves to go into the harrowing levels of details the authorities demand when presenting cases for seeking asylum.
Through these real-life stories, it forces the reader to explore their conscious opinions about refugees and challenge the fear-mongering and anti-immigrant positions that many countries have adopted. This book is really important. You need to read it.
Seasoning Level
CO2 | Salt | Pepper | Mixed Herbs | All Purpose Seasoning
Chapters Overview
The book is well structured and breaks the insights it gives into the lives of refugees into five core parts.
Part 1 covers in vivid details the action and risky process of escaping and leaving a country. You get a real sense of life for people in their homelands before and whilst they had to make life-saving and changing decisions.
Part 2 details the process of waiting and being allocated camps and temporary facilities. Dina visits one of the temporary accommodation that she was placed in recounting her experience there and the stories of daily life within those walls.
Part 3 explores the asylum process -The rejection letters and the asylum grantings that effectively helped many to reset their lives. A major topic of interest in this chapter is learning through various people's experience, as well as professionals, how the truth is interpreted and understood in different countries.
Part 4 is all about assimilation, and the expectations and assumptions of becoming the nation that adopted you.
Part 5 is titled cultural repatriation. It ends the book showing the different ways within the author's family, that cultural identity and belonging can show itself.
All the content of the book hit me really hard. But, the discussion between Dina and her baba/dad right at the end of the book caught me off guard. I found myself being really judgemental and feeling heated at his request for Dina to help her half-sister, who wanted to become an unaccompanied minor and refugee. Other than me thinking it was irresponsible and risky, I also felt that he had undermined and belittled the experience that Dina, her mum and brother had gone through.
At first when reading the book I was sure that certain parts I'd read before elsewhere and felt frustrated, and then it hit me. I'd read Dina's previous book 'Refuge' and the bits that I felt were repetitive were from the 'Refuge' book and in fact details are taken from her life.
I usually write notes as I read through a book, but I couldn't bring myself to when reading this book. This book will forever stay on my bookshelf, no swapsies or lending out for real. I had to close the book and pick another activity to do many times because the raw details of what many had gone through stirred up so many emotions for me. If it could do that for me, a reader, imagine what it felt like for those who were going through it.
Length
370 pages. It's not a book that you can read really quickly. It gives you a feeling of heartache so you have to slow down and really digest everything.
Big Quote
"Why do we ask the desperate to strip away their dignity for the price of our help?"
My name is not refugee Podcast Episode
After being so moved by the book I called a family meeting and asked my mum and Ga'mama if we could talk about their experiences as refugees in the 80s coming to the UK. It also happened to be World Refugee Day and I've written about it. My Ga'mama was initially uncomfortable about recording, and thought she couldn't add much to the conversation, but warmed up and wouldn't stop talking after. You can listen to the discussion here